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Oh wow..

I havent been on in FOREVER!
well, I'm just leaving a note saying I love my vinny still! and We are stronger then ever!!!
Our anniversary is comming up this friday =] and my bday is a day afer =] ill update everything as soon as I can =]

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OMFG!!

OK! WELL I haven't been on my LJ in FOREVER!!
Updates on me!

I finally got a MySpace yeah I kno...
anyway...
I have just been updated by my psychiatrist that I am no longer depressed...I'm bipolar...soooo yeah therefore I haven't been at school for like 2 weeks!!!!
My mom is afraid I may do something at school since I'm not taking meds anymore(thank god!) so yeah...
I'm still with my wonderful Vinny and we will celebrate our 8th anniversary on Friday! Annnnnnnnd My bday is on Saturday! wooooo 15! Finally!!!
Ill be bk on sooon and yeah!

Nothing...

God I feel so weak...Idk how to go on with living the life I live anymore...Every wrong turn leads me to fighting...I don't know what I did but I said to him that I loved him 2 times 5 mins. before he left and he's like didn't you just say that and I said what I can't say it twice and he said w/e bye...I just...I feel like I'm sort of missing something...Maybe another I love you...but I guess I'm too insignifigant sometimes to just say it back. Shit, now I'm crying great...Now I'm way too sensitive...I never win anything in my life...











God I'm shaking soo much...I feel like killing myself...I just Idk why I continue with this life anymore. I only do it for him and thats always enough but I hate going to bed where we don't completely miss eachother....
Fuck...life sucks...
I wish I weren't alone...

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Tests 2

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Tests

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"Why won't you listen?"

God, Vinnys parents are fucking driveing me nuts! No matter what I fucking do it won't fucking convince them that I'm not a slut who cuts like they think I am. I sent a video offa youtube to his mom and she didn't even take it as me informing her why people do it and how it's not for the attention. She basically asked Vinny Why I did it...When I clearly stated in the fucking email why I fucking did it!!! Jesus Christ! Are you honestly that stupid??? God, you know they have no fucking right to insult me!!!! The other thing that pisses me off is that when Vinny got into a fight with his dad his mom said you only do this because this is how Libby treats her dad. Yeah...ummm...WHEN THE FUCK DID I EVER MOTHER FUCKING CONVERSATE WITH YOU??? NONE THE LESS ABOUT HOW I TREAT MY FUCKING DAD!!!!! FYI, DON'T EVEN FUCKING JUDGE ME WHEN I'VE NEVER TALKED TO YOU IN MY FUCKING LIFE!!!!! I have never been so disgusted in my life that grown adults talk about a teenager behind her back acting as if she's nothing!
BURN IN HELL!!!!

Thank You

Thank you mom for never shutting your mouth. Thank you for letting him come back. Thank you for breaking your promise that things would change. Thank you for making John the way he is. I hope you burn...and become as miserable as you can be.
Thank you daddy...Thank you for yelling at John when he asked questions. Thank you for hitting my mom when times got difficult. Thank you for pushing me down to the ground and making me feel afraid. Thank you for making my life hell and no one understanding. Thank you for making me put the marks upon my arm that I can never erase...Thank for turning every damn thing on you...

Thank you my loving parents!!!!!!!! ^_^
You guys are soooooooo amazing!!!!

What did I do...?

Well...me and Vinny were talking and then he wanted to send me a flix. So he went away and he didnt come back. So I left him a bunch of messages and he came back saying "OMFG im doing hw" like I was supposed to know that...then he said "three messages" then signed off....I'm sooo fucking scared...I mean...did I do something? God, I just don't get it...I always mess up...It seems like its my fault always...

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